Make family dinner a priority and lose the TV

We were sitting at the dinner table and my 7-year-old son seemed exhausted. He had his head propped in his hands. I told him to sit up straight and asked him why he was so tired. He told me he spent his entire recess running from a girl named Stella. She tries to hug him, but he absolutely hates her. This is funny stuff for a mom to hear. Then he mentioned that he plays truth or dare with his friend Ethan.

In between bites of green beans, potato and chicken, I gently asked him more about this game. I wanted to know who started the game, what types of questions they asked, and, most importantly, what they were daring each other to do. His replies were all quite innocent, but I wanted to discuss the game while I had a window of opportunity.

We're one of those families that eats together. The television is off. In fact, we don't have a television anywhere near the dining room table. I'm flexible about many things, but I'm fanatical about us eating together. I understand busy schedules prevent many families from sharing meals every day, but it's important to make the effort.

Let's face it: Getting everyone to the table at the same time isn't always realistic. Sometimes, my husband has evening classes. To bring order to this change in our routine, I have named those days "Crazy Days." On Crazy Thursday, we all sit at the table minus dad, but we have less formal dinners. We might eat leftovers, sandwiches or breakfast for dinner. The point is that one missing family member is not going to spoil the moment for everyone else.

When schedules are tight or we're just plain tired, I'm flexible. We'll opt for a picnic at the park instead of a meal at home. Location isn't as important as the time spent together. Make the most of the opportunities you have. If you can't be together at dinner, why not try breakfast? Even an evening snack is an opportunity. Don't lose these moments to connect.

Sometimes our children don't have much to share, but we try to motivate them to share any tidbit. One way of encouraging them is by playing high and low. We ask them the best part of their day and the worst part of their day. This is never the time for heavy topics or family meetings. As parents, we have so few chances to connect with our children in a fun and positive way. This is one way we carve out the time and prompt conversation.

Positive moments together create strong families. They provide a safe haven for children, who learn that this is a time they can have their parents' full attention. This moment of family unity is, sadly, becoming a lost ritual.

Our children are young, but we've already been able to weave in many important discussions about bullying, friendships, peer pressure, manners and, most recently, truth or dare without it seeming like a lecture. It's one way that I can show how much I care and be available for the unexpected moments, when I can offer parental guidance.

Maybe my kids won't be sports stars because I insist on this time together instead of shuttling them to other activities, but I think it'll all work out fine. It's my sacred time, and I'm not giving it up. The chicken might be dry, but my family knows I value spending time with them.

Eating together matters. It should be a priority.

• Sara Noel owns Frugal Village (frugalvillage.com), a Web site that offers practical, money-saving strategies for everyday living. Send tips, comments or questions to Sara Noel, c/o United Media, 200 Madison Ave., 4th Floor, New York, NY 10016, or sara@frugalvillage.com.