'Pirate Radio' gives rock history a shallow ride
If you go to see Richard Curtis' comedy "Pirate Radio" expecting to see something as heartfelt, profound and witty as his phenomenal directorial debut "Love, Actually," you will likely be disappointed.
"Pirate Radio" (not much of an improvement over its original title "The Boat That Rocked") wears out its welcome at a gasping 134 minutes.
The characters tend to be more cartoony and homogeneous than the ones in "Love, Actually," and the plot is mostly built around a series of vignettes threaded together by a British censor's campaign to save the Queen's country from the dreaded, immoral influence of pop rock music.
"Pirate Radio" is based on a piece of rock history in Britain during the Soaring '60s when the stuffy BBC practically ignored that newfangled music popular with kids.
So, boats harboring floating radio stations appeared just off shore in Great Britain and blasted rock 'n' roll programs over the airwaves 24/7 to a grateful audience of about 25 million people.
We witness the workings of one pirate radio station, aboard a rusty trawler, Radio Rock, where a group of hedonistic, alcohol-swilling, drug-abusing, fun-loving DJs and their staff parties like it's 1966.
Into this mix of mayhem and music comes young Carl (Tom Sturridge), a bashfully shy and cute lad who's been ker-plopped into the care of his godfather, Quentin (Bill Nighy), the affected and affectionate leader of the DJs.
Carl feels a little out of place around the high-energy crew, especially chunky Dave (Nick Frost) whose attempts to help Carl get lucky are too stupid to work, the aptly named Thick Kevin (Tom Brooke), sad Irishman Simon (Chris O'Dowd), mysterious late-night host Smooth Bob (Ralph Brown) and Felicity (Katherine Parkinson), who introduces herself with "I'm a lesbian who cooks!"
The boat's superstar also functions as the film's token Yank, The Count (Philip Seymour Hoffman), whose status comes under attack when the king of Brit radio, Gavin (Rhys Ifans), joins the staff and instantly sets up a macho competition that could have helped the movie better had it been left in the editing room.
Curtis devises an obligatory romance for Carl. He meets the beguiling Marianne (Talulah Riley), who, in keeping with the times aboard the boat, is hardly a one-guy girl.
Emma Thompson props up the last half of "Pirate Radio" as Carl's way-liberal mom.
Erstwhile Shakespearean star Kenneth Branagh practically twirls a villainous mustache as Minister Dormandy, a clipped, cartoon villain given to tirades and shouting orders at his nebbish assistant, whose name for a female body part can't be printed in a family newspaper.
All these characters are distinct, but they lack the chemistry and depth of Curtis' better-written and directed creations in "Love, Actually.
When the movie's pace bogs down, Curtis throws in some infectious reaction shots of British teens driven crazy by the groovy tunes of a nostalgic, rocking soundtrack.
Still, Curtis reveals his desperation when he includes a campfire game with the crew, who volunteer embarrassing, gross, personal and unfunny information that, frankly, nobody wants to hear about.
At times like this, the characters go down for the Count.
"Pirate Radio"
Rating: 2½ stars
Starring: Tom Sturridge, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy, Rhys Darby
Directed by: Richard Curtis
Other: A Focus Films release. Rated R for language, nudity, sexual situations. 135 minutes