The things we, as neighbors, can do to help

In the most tragic of times, amid an almost unbearable grief, Jennifer Murphy Cazares paradoxically talked last week of blessings.

Overwhelmed by an outpouring of support, she said, "I am so blessed to live here, and to have grown up in a community like this."

She lives in Arlington Heights and suddenly has taken on responsibility for a niece and nephew orphaned by a house fire in the pre-dawn hours Tuesday. In a suicidal crime that surpasses understanding, artist Kevin Finnerty set his house and himself ablaze, killing his wife Trish and his 11-year-old son Garrett and leaving his 12-year-old daughter Bridgit to escape through a window onto the roof with her 6-year-old brother Pierce.

Such an especially poignant and haunting tragedy. As neighbors, we worry about those two heroic kids, how robbed not just of a family but also of a childhood they now have been. How, with the scars of this trauma, will they be able to carry on? And what can we do to help?

Yes, what can we do to help? There is a human yearning to reach out. That's what Cazares was referring to when she talked about her blessings. In her family's hours of need, she has been so touched by the response from friends and strangers. Students at South Middle School and Westgate Elementary School sent homemade cards. In the blink of an eye, the Downtown Arlington Heights Merchants association created a fundraiser. Funds for the children were set up at the Village Bank and Trust and at South Middle School. Everywhere, there have been hugs and heartfelt condolences.

We have a need as people, at times like this, to come together, to act as neighbors, to leave flowers at the sites of heartache. As Millard Fuller, the late founder of Habitat for Humanity, observed, "For a community to be whole and healthy, it must be based on people's love and concern for each other."

It is so uplifting to see that we are.

And yet, tragedy calls on each of us as neighbors to do more.

If we care about the awful events of Tuesday morning in Arlington Heights, we must wholly get involved in the fight against depression and mental illness. None of us would turn our backs on a friend with cancer, but those with mental illnesses are ostracized. We must offer our shoulders to these neighbors also and resolve to eradicate these sicknesses too. We must see that this is how we can help. If we truly care.

If we care about the murder Thursday of 31-year-old Norma Favela of Hanover Park, a pregnant mother bludgeoned to death with a hammer while her 2-year-old daughter slept beside her, we must wholly get involved in the fight against domestic violence. That 2-year-old orphan will have to suffer the scars of trauma too. If we care about her, we must wholly get involved in the fight against alcoholism and chemical abuse. We must see that this is how we can help. If we truly care.

If we care about our youth - if we care about 16-year-old Jesus Sanchez, shot to death May 23 a block from his home in Hanover Park on his way back from playing soccer; if we care about 12-year-old Jorge Juarez, killed in a fire on May 9 when gangbangers threw a Molotov cocktail through the window of the Mundelein house where his family had moved to try to escape the gangs - we must wholly get involved in the fight against street gangs. We must see that this is how we can help. If we truly care.

"In every community," author Marianne Williamson once said, "there is work to be done. In every nation, there are wounds to heal. In every heart, there is the power to do it."

On this Sunday of so much mourning, let that be our steadfast resolution.