An Illinois victim's manifesto

Governor Quinn has proposed increasing the state income tax and various user fees to save Illinois from bankruptcy. In response, I nail this manifesto to the Capitol building's door. Instead of buying a third car this summer for my two teenagers to use as they go to work, I shall not. I refuse to pay any more exorbitant sales taxes and higher registration fees. If my kids cannot get to their jobs without driving, then we shall simply forgo the extra income; hence, no extra income taxes to the state. I shall not buy lawn-care products for my yard. Let my property look as poor and bare as its owner's pocketbook. I shall have to buy food and medicine and gas in Illinois, it's true; but everything else - clothes, books, DVDs, kaleidoscopes - I shall purchase online, from out-of-state vendors. At the office, I shall not work any overtime. Maybe this year I can earn enough to live, without going over into the 4.5 percent bracket. I want to stop being a mean-spirited "producer," and learn to be one of the "takers." My family and I will eat out infrequently; we shall watch only Netflix movies; we will boycott any activity that remits ill-gotten resources to Springfield. And when the time is ripe, I shall take my work ethic, my good wife, and my two straight-A students out of this miserable state run by crooks and incompetents. We shall seek pastures where the government does not tax the very color green. Yes, we shall move to greener pastures in a red state. This, I swear.

Alexander Lee

Carol Stream