Support group helps compulsive overeaters make it through holidays

It starts with the moist, golden-browned turkey, then Christmas dinner at Grandma's. It ends with shrimp and champagne on New Year's Eve. The six-week-long food fest we call the holidays is in full swing.

Longer than Macy's parade, the cavalcade of goodies doesn't stop. Dinner rolls dripping with warm butter. Mountains of mashed potatoes smothered in gravy. Sugar cookies, pumpkin pie, bottomless bowls of M&Ms.

Gluttony is not only accepted, it's expected. Jokes about being in a "food coma" are good for a few laughs.

But for some, the overindulgence is no laughing matter. For people struggling with compulsive-eating disorders, the holidays can be a minefield. But with support, the temptation to binge can be controlled.

Members of a local chapter of Overeaters Anonymous tell how they cope with the holidays by focusing on family and friends, not food.

Mary: Calling for support

Mary always starts Thanksgiving Day by attending an OA meeting. The Libertyville woman, an OA member for six years, said getting together with like-minded people on the eve of the food-filled day is essential. "We put on our protective gear," said the Libertyville woman. "We use our tools of recovery to make it through the holiday season. Attending meetings, journaling, reading, praying. We do whatever it takes."

Mary said it's common for her to step away from a party to call another OA member for support.

"There's been times when I've phoned a friend to say, 'Hey, I made it through lunch, but dinner is coming. Let's talk.'"

In the years she's been with OA, Mary has lost more than 100 pounds. But she emphasized that being in OA is not about dieting. "This is about admitting that we are powerless over food and that only a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity," she said paraphrasing the first steps in the 12-step program. "It's also about taking one day at a time."

Eating disorders expert Dr. Kathryn Zerbe says compulsive overeaters are consumed with thoughts about food. "Individuals who have a preoccupation with eating and body image to the exclusion of everything else likely have an eating disorder," she said. "When those thoughts intrude into everyday life, it's time to get some help."

A professor of psychiatry at the Oregon Health and Science University, Zerbe has 30 years of experience treating people with compulsive-eating problems. She said people often use food like medication.

"Eating can dampen feelings of loneliness," she explained. "Overeating can also be a defense mechanism that keep people from dealing with conflict, anger, loss or a bad relationship."

Robert: Sugar is a trigger

Anger has been an issue for OA member Robert. He says the holidays have been some of the hardest weeks for him. Instead of feeling the joy of the season, he would find himself irritable and cranky. "It was common for me to come into the holidays consumed with thoughts about food and thoughts about myself," said the Lake Villa man. "I would take that out on the people closest to me."

He's struggled with weight gain, but said the frustration wasn't about the scale. It was about the loss of control over his eating. He joined OA about 17 years ago. He's had mixed success over the years, but feels he's finally in a good place.

Robert types out a precise food plan for each day and sticks to it. He knows white sugar is one of his trigger foods, so if he's headed to a party he'll bring a fruit salad as his "dish-to-pass." And he stays in close touch with other OA members during the food-filled weeks.

"I've come to a place where I can focus on people, not food," he said. "I feel like I'm plugging back into life. People need to know recovery is possible."

Zerbe says the holidays are packed with potential for binging. But it's not just about the mass quantities of available food. "The holidays are loaded with psychological triggers," she said. "People are forced into looking at loss. The loss of realizing the kids are grown and gone now. Broken relationships and fractured families are magnified this time of year. People will use food to cope with these feelings and that can result in guilt and shame, which intensifies the psychological pain."

Kay: No more guilt

OA member Kay knows firsthand about the self-imposed disgrace. But, she says she's been freed from that guilt. The retired chemist from Lincolnshire credits her "higher power" for the progress she's made.

"I couldn't do this on my own," she said. "My higher power has lifted this burden from me. I want everyone to know you are not alone in this. There is a way and that's OA."

<p class="factboxheadblack">Holiday help</p> <p class="News">Founded in 1960, Overeaters Anonymous follows the traditional 12-step program started by Alcoholics Anonymous. The New Mexico-based organization is active in 75 countries with 6,500 groups meeting weekly.</p> <p class="News">For a list of local meetings and more information about Overeaters Anonymous, visit <a href="http://www.oa.org" target="new">oa.org</a>.</p>