From online to the altar

There's no telling when - or how - love will strike.

Maybe after a few months working together in nearby cubicles.

Or instantly at a friend's dinner party.

And with about 20 million people dating online each month and more than 120,000 of them marrying each year, according to Online Dating Magazine, there's a good chance you could discover amore on the Internet, too.

"Meeting someone online is, in many ways, better," says Match.com romance expert Tanya Crosby. "You're going to get to know this person at a healthy pace, exchange e-mails and know upfront what their goals are or what they're looking for."

But instead of just creating a profile and hoping for the best, though, three suburban married couples say there are tricks to finding the real thing on the Web.

Pay attention to detail

When Amy Luedke first moved from a small town in Iowa to teach at a school in Elgin, she didn't know a soul nearby. Her younger co-workers immediately suggested online dating, but Luedke was leery.

"Anyone who lives in my hometown is very cautious and it took a lot of coaxing for me to do that," says the 28-year-old. After two so-so dates, Luedke connected with a man who took things to new heights - literally. After several e-mails she met with Scott, who actually stands at the 6 feet 9 inches he advertised in his profile. He scored major points with Amy, who is 6 feet 1 inch.

"I know it sounds silly, but height is important to me and was a major issue in past relationships," she said. "I wanted someone I could wear heels with."

The two clicked immediately, Ludke says, and today she's married to 30-year-old Scott. While their happiness involves a lot more than height and high heels, Luedke says online daters shouldn't be afraid to be specific about what they want. And they also should simply muster up a little courage.

"You've got to get past that scary experience and find out that he's a real person and maybe not just some scary guy," she says.

Go all-in

As a sales rep, Paul Sprau says he didn't have time to find a serious relationship by hanging out on the social scene. So the 38-year-old thought online dating would be the perfect fit.

Problem was, he didn't have time to create an alluring profile either.

"I created a half-baked profile that didn't have any pictures in it or a lot of detail, so I didn't get a lot of responses to it and people didn't write back often when I messaged them," said Sprau, 38, of Buffalo Grove.

But after putting more effort (and pictures) into his profile, the ladies started showing up. After three or four e-mails, he would meet each of them.

"I had a lot of interesting dates - I met a Southern belle and a cosmopolitan career woman - but I didn't take them too seriously, even though in the back of my mind I was looking for something real," Sprau said.

He wasn't sure how things would go on his date with Susan, since he wasn't wowed by her pictures. When they met in person, though, Sprau found the photos did her no justice and quickly realized she was the one.

Paul and Susan Sprau have been married about two months now, after more than a year of dating, and he said their elaborate profiles helped them make the right match.

"It's like anything else in life, you get out of it what you put into it," says Sprau. I think there's a stigma about dating online, but what's dumber about that than walking up to someone after a few drinks in a bar and dropping a pickup line?. It's much smarter to do it this way because of the whole pre-screening process. I created a profile that was 100 percent true and got a lot more out of it."

Persistence pays

It had been almost 10 years since Paul Fredericks and his wife divorced. And for several of those years he was living in Naperville and using a dating service with little success. So, despite his weariness, he vowed to give the Internet a whirl.

Meanwhile, newly-divorced Connie had also created an online profile and contacted Fredericks for a date.

The problem was, Paul was shying away from his online matches and giving things another go with an old flame.

It was no matter to Connie, though. When Fredericks and his lady broke up and he headed back to the Web, Connie made her second move.

"She was kind of open and unfamiliar, while I was kind of cautious and picky after all of my experiences, so it was a good combination with the two different approaches and attitudes when they came together," says Fredericks. Like Luedke, Sprau and their spouses, Fredericks and Connie both took a very honest approach with their profiles and knew what they wanted. Fredericks says that, in addition to Connie's persistence, is how they ended up married for more than two years now.

"Look for someone who shares your values and goals," he says. "If you're a very low-key person, don't be swept off your feet by someone who is a thrill seeker. It may make for a great first couple of weeks, but it's going to lead to anything long term if you're not honest."

Summer drama: Keep your theater date casual (and cheap) this weekend with a free performance of Shakespeare's gender-bending romantic comedy, "Twelfth Night." And the bonus? You don't have to cram into those stiff auditorium chairs because The Midsummer Theatre Troupe will present the play at these outdoor locations this month: Central Park in Naperville, 104 E. Benton Ave., at 7 p.m. today; Cantigny Memorial Park in Wheaton, 1S151 Winfield Road, at 6 p.m. Sunday; Walter Payton's Roundhouse in Aurora, 205 N. Broadway Ave., at 7 p.m. Tuesday; McCarty Park in Aurora, New York Street and Park Place, at 5 p.m. July 27. All performances are free except Cantigny, which costs $8 per car to enter. Your should bring chairs, blankets, picnic baskets and food to all performances, except the show at the Roundhouse. For details, e-mail thixtroupe@gmail.com.

Summer spirits: You're into wine and she loves a good brew. (Or maybe it's the other way around?) No matter what spirits you crave, for $10 you can taste-test both during Grapes & Hops from 6 to 8 p.m. this Wednesday, as well as July 30, Aug. 13 and 27, and Sept. 3 at the Chicago Botanic Garden, 1000 Lake Cook Road, Glencoe. Complimentary light fare will be provided, or you can cash in on a 10 percent discount offered at the Garden Grille on these nights. Parking is $15 and the Chicago Botanic Garden Trolley will operate between the garden and the Glencoe Metra station during event hours. Round-trip tickets are $2. For details, visitchicagobotanic.org/grapeshops.

And summer for singles: Maybe you're looking for someone special, or maybe you just want some eye candy. With any luck you'll find both on July 24, Ai Japanese Restaurant, at 358 W. Ontario St. in Chicago, when it launches its first "Singles to Mingle" night from 6 to 8 p.m. Your $10 admission includes complimentary champagne and signature appetizers and sushi. You can pop in to check out the scene, but reservations are recommended. For details, call (312) 335-9888 or visit aichicago.us.