For some, the grief is just beginning
As I prepared to leave work on Feb. 14, I was paged to report to the office.
The secretary was quick to say "Every thing is OK." Then said there had been a shooting at NIU and that my husband had called to say that our daughter was all right.
A voice message on my cell phone from my husband said to call as soon as possible.
It was then I learned he had been trying to call our daughter at NIU but had not been able to reach her yet.
As I sat in my car, praying for the safety of my daughter and others, I tried to convince myself I would soon hear good news.
Thankfully, I did. My daughter was in a locked-down classroom that was a safe distance from Cole Hall.
Other people, other parents did not hear good news.
Since that terrible day I have prayed for the parents and families of the students who were killed and injured.
As students, faculty and staff returned to campus they began the process of going forward, the process of resuming their normal lives.
But the return to a normal daily life for the parents and families whose children died will not begin anytime soon.
As other people begin to put what happened on Valentine's Day behind them, the bereaved parents and families are only beginning the long slow journey of grief.
They are just beginning to accept their loss, just beginning to feel the full impact and pain of their grief.
They will need encouragement, support and understanding much longer than many people realize.
Their lives will never be the same again; they will never be the same.
But with time, patience, support and love, they can have resolution of their grief and move forward with a different life than the one they had; a life that can once again have meaning and peace.
Jean Hotopp
St. Charles