Fatherly advice to save your life in NIU-style disaster

Over the weekend, I sent this letter to my own children who are in high school and college:

Dear Goudie children,

I'm sad and sorry to be writing this to you, but there is really no choice.

When you were kids, your mother and I taught you all about "Stranger Danger," and how to "Stop, Drop and Roll," if your clothes caught on fire.

But it wasn't enough.

We told you to always do the loving thing, tell the truth, help others, treat people with kindness, be mindful of your manners, go to church and eat your vegetables.

But that wasn't enough.

When we sent you off to school, we told you to "be careful" and "stay safe." But that was lacking too.

We overlooked something that never really seemed essential: how to live through the kind of tragedy that happened at Northern Illinois or Virginia Tech.

This is not intended to frighten you or make you overreact to every noise and shadow, because most things that startle us end up being nothing. But you still need to read this carefully and remember it.

I'll make it easy. This will hopefully teach you how to LIVE. Just remember the word L-I-V-E. That is your goal and the word you use to accomplish it.

L is for LOOK.

When you get inside any classroom, lecture hall, auditorium, gymnasium, church or airplane, LOOK for the closest exit. LOOK at how you would get to it if you had to. And then LOOK for a backup exit in case the first one is blocked or locked.

It doesn't have to be a door. Maybe it is a window.

This doesn't have to be a big deal. Do it quietly, but do it. In a short time, it will become automatic. And it could save your life.

If there is somebody threatening your classroom with a gun, it will be too late to find a way out. Don't just sit there waiting your turn to get shot.

Give yourself a chance. It starts with a good LOOK.

I is for IMMEDIATELY.

If something happens, or if you sense something isn't right, don't wait. Remove yourself from the looming danger IMMEDIATELY.

If you see someone with a gun, hear gunshots or an explosion, you want to go the other direction IMMEDIATELY. But keep your eyes open. There could be more than one person, and they could be the direction you're heading.

I does not stand for I-Report, the CNN promotion to get viewers to use their cell phone cameras to photograph news when they see it.

Don't wait around to play reporter. It could end up getting you killed. You don't want to be there to see whether the person has a shotgun or a pistol.

Trust me. Real reporters are trained to get themselves out of harm's way. IMMEDIATELY.

V is for VANISH.

The best option is probably out the closest door … then out of the building. You may have to go through a window, and that might mean breaking the window with a chair or fire extinguisher. Forget about it, I'll pay for it.

Avoid running down long hallways. You'll make yourself an easy target. As you look for a way to VANISH, run a zigzag pattern. You'll become far less of a target.

Run as far from the trouble as possible and as quickly.

Whether you can get out of the room and away from the danger or not, you have to try to VANISH from the view and the firepower of the bad guy. To VANISH doesn't mean just crouching down behind a folding chair or hiding behind a desk so the shooter can't see you.

Bullets go through sheet metal and plywood.

You need to VANISH by taking cover behind something that will protect you such as a brick wall or the engine block of a car.

Do not VANISH in a room with no windows and only one way in or out, like a lot of classrooms. If this is the kind of room that somebody tells you to go in, or you are assigned to go in because of some emergency "plan," don't do it. It could end up a dead end. Literally.

Use your own common sense when you VANISH.

E is for EMBARRASSMENT.

Be willing to do things that in normal circumstances would be an EMBARRASSMENT to you, like being the first one to react when something unusual happens. In an airline emergency, why do you think the instruction is to give oxygen to yourself first? Because you can't help others if you're unconscious or dead.

If somebody walks into the auditorium with a rifle, don't wait there to see if it is some kind of stunt. Go into L-I-V-E mode.

If it's not the real thing and is some kind of unannounced, instant drill, I assure you that these days those responsible will be fired.

If it is the real thing and the shooting starts and people go down before you can get away, then play dead. People have saved themselves in similar situation by playing dead. Shooters generally don't take the time to check pulses.

EMBARRASSMENT is better than actually being dead.

The odds of you ever needing any of this are very low. But they were the same odds that those five students at NIU had. And they were the same odds as those 32 innocent victims at Virginia Tech.

Take my advice: be a hero … save yourself.

L-I-V-E and love,

Dad