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For a romantic comedy, this 'Holiday' isn't perfect

Indiscriminating audiences desperate for a seasonal fix of safe and sweet romantic comedies need look no further than "The Perfect Holiday," a cute and trite ensemble effort with the all the originality of re-gifted fruitcake.

The plot involves a selfless wanna-be songwriter named Benjamin (Morris Chestnut), who works as a department store Santa Claus. He's so noble that he gives his last $5 to a needy hobo, never realizing the bum is really Queen Latifah in disguise. (More on this strange development in a moment.)

One day, a pretty woman named Nancy (Gabrielle Union) catches his eye at the same time her daughter Emily (Khail Bryant) lands in his lap with a special Christmas wish for her mommy: that a handsome man compliment her without any ulterior motive. Later on the street, Benjamin, sans his Santa gear, fulfills her wish. She becomes captivated by the handsome Benjamin, who continues to receive insider tips from her kids, never suspecting Santa's true identity.

Benjamin feels bad about scamming the poor woman. "It's a betrayal of the Santa trust!" he whines to Jamal (Faizon Love), another department store Santa and chunky comic relief character who milks uncomfortable laughs out of stuffing his face.

Benjamin doesn't know that Nancy is divorcing rapper superstar Jizzy (a perfectly cast Charlie Murphy), a cad dad and grubby hubby with a new Christmas CD ready to go.

His wily manager Delicious (Katt Williams) thinks Jizzy needs one good song. Of course, Delicious doesn't realize that a self-less, wanna-be songwriter has already slipped Jizzy a perfect Christmas song, but he doesn't know it yet.

"The Perfect Holiday," imperfectly written and directed by Lance Rivera, could be the ugliest Christmas movie on record. The flat, unflattering photography gives the movie a cheap, discolored texture. The cast members, even the perky Gabrielle, look as if they've digested some spoiled holiday meat.

Queen Latifah and Chicago's own Terrence Howard pop in and out of the story as two celestial beings, although their origins and purposes are muddled.

Even though the premise of "The Perfect Holiday" sounds workable, Rivera stoops to hokey gimmicks, such as forcing Benjamin, in accordance with romantic comedy tradition, to tell a Big Lie so he has something to be forgiven for in the final scene. As if that's not lame enough, Rivera constructs a ludicrous, climactic rescue scene involving a child dangling from a Christmas tree! This desperate attempt to generate a sense of danger almost elicits as much laughs as the intended jokes.

For a romantic holiday comedy, that's kinda tragic.

"The Perfect Holiday"

1 1/2 star

out of four

Opens today

Starring As

Morris Chestnut Benjamin

Gabrielle Union Nancy

Queen Latifah Narrator

Terrence Howard Bah-Humburg

Charlie Murphy Jizzy

Written and directed by Lance Rivera. Produced Mike Elliott, Joseph P. Genier, Marvin Peart, Shakim Compere, Queen Latifah and Leifur B. Dagfinnsson. Directed by Lance Rivera. A Yari Company release. Rated PG. Running time: 96 minutes.

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