Mistakes suck '30 Days' dry
TV ads claim "30 Days of Night" presents "a new vision of the vampire." Well, yes. Technically, these exact vampires have never been seen on the screen, although they manage to appear long in the tooth anyway.
The Caucasoid creatures who dress like extras from an old Marilyn Manson video are indeed vampires, but they may as well be "zombies," or however you'd classify the beasts from "28 Weeks Later." In fact, future audiences might rent "30 Days" because they've mistaken its title and crimson poster art for that of the superior "28 Days Later" sequel.
"30 Days of Night" is actually based on a 2002 comic book miniseries by Steve Niles, who co-wrote the screenplay. After viewing it, anyone unfamiliar with the title might wonder why the book was so revered. Without artist Ben Templesmith's stark, stylish images, Niles' is just another tale of Eurotrash monsters run amok.
The conceit here is that the bloodsuckers attack Barrows, an isolated Alaska town which, due to its northern location, experiences a month without sunlight every year. The town empties out ahead of time, but fire marshal Stella Oleson (Melissa George) is stranded in Barrows when the sun goes down. It's especially troubling for her because her estranged husband, Eben (a somnambulant Josh Hartnett), is Barrows' sheriff.
Of course, the rift in our lead couple's marriage isn't the only source of tension. First, a local man's dogs are slaughtered and drained of blood. Then a surly, meat-craving stranger (Ben Foster, Angel from "X-Men: The Last Stand") appears, naturally cackling and hollering warnings that "they're coming!" If this isn't enough, plenty of ominous music when nothing scary is happening reminds us that it might.
The film's strongest impression is made by the vampire leader, Marlow (Danny Huston). He's prone to your typical speeches about how his kind are better than humans, but does this in a subtitled vampire language -- even when addressing humans, as if Marlow thinks they can understand him. With enormous pupils and uncomfortable-looking prosthetic teeth, Huston glares and mumbles his way through the film like a beached piranha wishing it was a Cenobite from "Hellraiser."
The initial attack on Barrows' stragglers is capped with an overhead shot tracking the vampires' trail of carnage through the town, which would be more impressive if it wasn't so similar to one from the "Dawn of the Dead" remake. Pity the survivors, who have to hide out for several weeks, going through the familiar motions of zombie-style "infestation" flicks.
You know these. The "eek, what's happening?" scene. The "let's move somewhere safer" scene. The "you gotta kill me, I don't want to turn into one of those th-things" scene. The infighting is calamitous. The sacrifices are noble. The separated couple, forced to work together, gets over deep-seated marital troubles in the space of one stilted conversation.
Eben is slowed by his chronic asthma -- which would have been a unique weakness for a hero, if only it affected him more than once -- but the vamps' breathing is so noisy, they may suffer from the same condition. Rasping, snarling, wheezing, screaming … it's a good thing for these predators that they're fast and strong, because they can't plausibly sneak up on victims.
Honestly, if the vampires were serious about their goal of wiping out all of Barrows, wouldn't Marlow think to burn it down before day 29 of their sunless sojourn?
"30 Days of Night"
1 1/2 stars out of four
Opens today
Starring As
Josh Hartnett: Eben Oleson
Melissa George: Stella Oleson
Danny Huston: Marlow
Ben Foster: The Stranger
Written by Steve Niles, Stuart Beattie and Brian Nelson. Produced by Sam Raimi and Rob Tapert. Directed by David Slade. A Columbia Pictures release. Rated R (strong horror violence and language). Running time: 113 minutes.