Hey ref, you're right -- it's a jungle out there

It was supposed to be a meeting of youth sports coaches to discuss new rules and procedures.

That's how it started. But it quickly took a turn for the worst.

After presenting the usual, general information, the league president took a harsh tone for his next topic. "We fully expect -- and demand -- that all coaches treat our referees and officials with the respect they deserve," he said. "You will be held accountable for your behavior."

Well, of course, I thought. That goes without saying. Standard decorum. Nodding my head in agreement, I awaited the next topic.

He was only beginning to address the issue. "We've had too many incidents in the past…coaches verbally abusing our referees, parents berating them up and down the sidelines. Some of our officials have even been confronted after games.

"We'll be monitoring this type of behavior very closely. And we're warning you now it won't be tolerated."

By now, my blood was boiling -- not because of what the president said, but because he had to say it.

I looked around the crowded room of 40-50 volunteer coaches. Hard to tell who might be an offender. None, hopefully.

Yet, two weeks into an eight-week season, it was on display. There he was -- a middle-aged coach, the adult leader of grade-school kids -- loudly and angrily questioning a young female referee, demanding to know how she could have made the call she made.

Beyond infuriating, it was revolting and embarrassing. This so-called coach obviously didn't comprehend the detrimental effect his actions have on the young players around him. Just as deplorable was that his rant was against a teenager -- a high school sophomore -- who was working her tail off to officiate the game.

Sad to say, it's a scene that's all too common. That's what makes it all the more unacceptable.

I see it on a regular basis while covering high school sports. Parents become especially viscous at that level. True, the stakes are higher, but still, that's no justification for ref-bashing.

I'm no apologist for referees, either. They make bad calls. Horrible calls. Blatantly erroneous judgments. And some game officials aren't very friendly, either.

I guess that makes them human -- just like the kids they're officiating, who drop balls, make bad throws and commit untimely errors. Fortunately, you don't hear fans shouting derogatory trash talk toward players. Mistakes are part of the game -- except for referees, who are afforded no margin for error.

But without them, the games our kids play aren't played. That's what is apparently lost on these overzealous coaches and parents.

It's absurd to believe any referee has an agenda other than to make the correct call. Yet, the next time I hear someone cry "call it both ways" will be the millionth time I've heard it. Ridiculous. Not only is it insulting to the ref, but that loathsome accusation is a reflection of a coach's IQ.

A player drops a pass and is greeted with an encouraging pat on the backside. "Get 'em next time," the coach will say. A referee makes a legitimate call, and he's derided with "Come on! What are you lookin' at?!"

With every correct call, a ref is still wrong in the eyes of many.

That helps explain why there is an ongoing shortage of referees and officials for high school sports on down to the aforementioned youth levels. Apparently, people don't like to be abused and humiliated. Imagine that. But we all suffer when there's a shortage of those who wear the stripes.

Too many "fans" and "coaches" have blurred vision. We see coaches on TV go ballistic on refs and figure that's the model of intensity. We excuse it as heat-of-the-moment passion or chalk it up to fire-in-our-belly competitiveness.

Baloney. Just because emotions run high in the athletic arena does not provide license to mistreat and disrespect those with whom you disagree.

We're above that, aren't we? Most of us are, anyway. For the sake of sportsmanship, class and decency, we should all be held to higher standards.

No disputing that call.