'Woodcock' tries, but ends up wasting comic premise
"Mr. Woodcock" boasts a perfect cast and lots of laughs, plus it serves as an example of what happens when filmmakers have an inspired comic idea, but don't know what to do with it.
The premise: Successful self-help author John Farley (Seann William Scott, alias Stifler from "American Pie") returns to his small hometown to live the fantasy of being celebrated as a successful local boy.
Then, Farley discovers that his single mom, Beverly (Susan Sarandon, still too sexy for middle age), has been romantically involved with Jasper Woodcock, the infamous bully and high school PE teacher who ridiculed and shamed Farley as an out-of-shape student.
Now, it's high school all over again. Woodcock reverts to his taunting coach persona, and Farley adopts a familiar, desperate defensive posture.
Billy Bob Thornton, an artist when it comes to painting portraits of self-possessed heels, plays Woodcock with a layer of self-righteous indignation slathered over a core of smug superiority.
"You want to be spanked?" Woodcock goads Farley. "That seems to run in the family!"
The mano-a-mano conflict escalates with Farley teaming up with his still-chunky high school buddy Jay Nedderman (Ethan Suplee). Farley commits to rescuing Mom, despite dire warnings from his book-tour manager (a perfectly acidic Amy Poehler) that he'll lose book sales.
Instead of building to a ridiculous, clever climax, "Mr. Woodcock" merely peters off into the distance as this script -- the first one produced by Michael Carnes and Josh Gilbert -- lamely argues that the abusive, insulting Mr. Woodcocks of the world are good for kids because they build character.
They got it wrong.
The Mr. Woodcocks of the world build up their own character over the carcasses of their students' self-esteem.
But that's not very funny to put in a movie.
"Mr. Woodcock"
2 1/2 stars out of four
Opens today
Starring: Billy Bob Thornton, Seann William, Susan Sarandon.
Written by Michael Carnes and Josh Gilbert. Produced by Bob Cooper and David Dobkin. Directed by Craig Gillespie. A New Line Cinema release. Rated PG-13 (crude humor, sexual situations, language, drug references). Running time: 87 minutes.