Within football, let's all remember family

I never had the privilege of meeting Mel and Berneice Schlueter.

But as the high school football season kicks off tonight, they will be on the minds of many, especially those around the Jacobs High School program.

Mel and Berneice were the parents of Jacobs' head varsity football coach, Dean Schlueter, who I'm sure everyone would agree is one of the classiest professionals in high school sports.

Dean's parents had just finished off their 55th wedding anniversary celebration on July 27 by having dinner with Dean and his wife Diane, whose birthday was the next day, after a day in Chicago that included a lunch cruise and a movie. They were headed back to their Rockford home -- the same one they had lived in since Dean's childhood -- when they were tragically killed in an auto accident.

As important as tonight is to football lovers around the state, it is now more important to those who know Dean Schlueter and the values and faith he possesses. Football is only a game. Schlueter and the Jacobs family are still dealing with much more than a game.

"We feel best that we were able to tell them we loved them before they left our house that night," said Schlueter with a cracking voice earlier this week. We know there are blessings through their lives but some things have been so painful. There's just a huge hole in my heart … losing them at the same time …"

Dealing with death is never easy under any circumstances. Dealing with tragic, unexpected and sudden death is even harder. But Schlueter, who has two older brothers and two younger sisters, believes his parents are in a better place today, and it's his faith in that that has helped carry him back to school and into the football season. Having lost my own father three years ago this week, I can relate to that in so many ways.

"They were very strong and vital people," Schlueter said of his dad, who was 81, and his 78-year old mom. "If there's a blessing it's that they were together and they didn't have to suffer any long and debilitating illness. We all have a ton of peace about where they're at."

Schlueter, who played on Rockford East's 1974 state championship football team, described his parents as incredibly supportive in all their children's endeavors, including in Dean's 11 years as Jacobs' coach. Even as his mom acquired arthritic knees that kept her away from some games, Mel was a fixture watching the Golden Eagles play.

"They loved our kids," Dean said. "They loved watching our kids play. My dad has missed only a handful of games in the 28 years I've been coaching. They were always there together until mom couldn't make some games because of her knees. But dad was still always there and mom was calling to see how we did. The 'Be There' factor was huge.

"Just having them there was a gift to all of us children. They were always there and it didn't matter what it was. Their presence meant a ton to us. It was a gift of love we were really blessed with and I just can't express in words how deep their love for us was."

Schlueter is a low-key guy when it comes to personal matters. But he has been deeply touched by the show of support from those around him this past month.

"People have been so nice," he said. "It's really been overwhelming. I know people are honoring my parents and that means a ton to me."

Far too often we take life and what we have for granted. All of us should take a moment tonight before that first kickoff to simply remember the gifts we have in this life are not forever, and that we should truly cherish every moment we have with our families.

I know that's what Dean Schlueter and his family are doing. And from that, hopefully, will come inner peace.