Respect the tragedy of a family's loss

I have been a police officer for 21-plus years. The most difficult part of this job is telling a family member that their loved one has died, regardless of the cause of death. I once told the mother of a career criminal her son was dead, and offered my condolences as I was sorry for "her" loss.

My own family experienced this when my wife's son, my stepson, died tragically with two other young men in a motor vehicle accident which involved alcohol. This was something we never thought we would experience, and to this day it is our most painful experience.

That said, we are obviously not promoting driving under the influence. But there are simply some things which are right and proper. When there is a death we extend our sorrow, we remove hats in funeral homes and/or as a hearse passes, we turn down our stereos as we wait for the funeral procession to pass, etc. That is respectful, as we honor the dead and grieve for those left behind.

What has happened recently in some of the newspaper articles and editorials after the death of officer Ken Free, my colleague and friend, is shameful. He was a man who risked his life daily simply by putting on a badge and gun. This may have given him the feeling of invincibility we caution "rookies" not to get, as we are all human. In any case, he has paid the most ultimate sacrifice for his humanness. He leaves behind a wife, small children, and family. I hope his life serves as a reminder that police are people and have frailties and families, and that drinking and driving don't mix .... so he will not have died in vain, but will continue saving lives in his death.

I will miss you Ken. My thoughts and prayers to your family

John K. Van Dien II

Lindenhurst