Cuban-Cubs talk nothing more than a smoke screen
Hardly a day goes by that we don't hear from someone who'd like to see Mark Cuban buy the Cubs.
Well, let me make this as simple as I can for you:
Cuban isn't to get the Cubs now, never was going to get the Cubs, and never will get the Cubs.
It was an absurd idea when it first popped up several years ago, and it is no less so today.
Cuban is considered by Major League Baseball -- and for the purposes of this discussion, that means Bud Selig and Jerry Reinsdorf -- to be a loose cannon at best and a rogue nation at worst.
Baseball doesn't want the Cubs to wind up with a wacky owner doing wacky things and making wacky statements, a maverick riding in on his white horse with wild ideas of saving the franchise.
The Cubs don't need saving. They need stability, and ownership is the least important part of the equation in baseball once the correct management team has been selected and put in office, and left there to do its job independent of interference from non-baseball execs.
So baseball looks for local money with ownership experience and a responsible budgetary outlook.
That sounds precisely like the John Canning group, with people like Andy McKenna and Patrick Ryan, and that's why they're the leaders in the clubhouse.
As for Cuban, his future -- or lack of it -- in baseball largely will depend on how he handles his dismissal from this process.
If he stomps and screams and throws his pacifier at Selig, he can forget about ever having a chance to purchase a Major League Baseball team.
However, Selig can be a reasonable man when it comes to these matters, and if Cuban handles this with class, learns from the very complicated procedures, and demonstrates that he can play nice with others, he'll get a chance to buy his beloved Pirates, should they come back on the market in the next year or two.
That not only makes sense, but also makes for a terrific story if he becomes the lungfish who saved Pittsburgh.
If he insists, he can even bring along his white horse.
Tiger and MJ
Ever since he won the PGA Championship on Sunday, Tiger Woods has been second-guessed and nitpicked for the way he let Woody Austin and Ernie Els back into it, rather than run away with it Tiger-style.
Not sure why this is so hard for the establishment to understand, but Woods plays golf like a great athlete, not only a great golfer.
He had a big lead, played solid defense, and when he needed a big play, he flipped the switch, took it to the hoop and dunked right in their faces.
It's the same way Michael Jordan took off a quarter or a game on offense during a brutal playoff series, saving his energy for when he needed it.
Whenever I see Woods do this, I think of Jordan in the quarterfinals against the Knicks in 1992, when Jordan had 37 in a tough Game 5 as the Bulls took a 3-2 lead, and only 21 in Game 6 as the Knicks won easily.
He settled for a lot of outside shots and generally seemed to rest, knowing there still was a Game 7 at home, where he poured in 42 in a blowout, including 18 in the first quarter.
Tiger's birdie on 15 was the dunk, and his perfect tee shot on 16 was the stare.
Game, set, major.
Best stat
Of the last 12 majors, Tiger Woods has won five, and placed second three times with a third and a fourth. That accounts for 10 of the last 12.
The other two were the U.S. Open in 2006, when he missed the cut a month after his father died, and the British Open this year, when he finished 12th.
At the PGA last weekend, Woods indicated that he intends to think less technically about his swing and go more by feel and hit what he calls "the right shot,'' shedding some technical aspects of his swing if necessary.
If Woods had altered his thinking prior to the Masters this year, he'd very likely be sitting on 15 majors (not 13) today.
It also leads you to believe he's going to come out with a vengeance in 2008, when he might bank two or three more majors.
Next best stat
Tiger Woods was in the top 10 in every major statistical category at the PGA Championship except for driving distance (14th), which goes to show -- once again -- that if he's willing to stow his ego and his driver, he's pretty much unbeatable.
Good call
Turns out not every coach in the NFL is all about image, self-promotion and cliché.
Take Sean Payton, for example. The reigning NFL coach of the year and former Naperville resident passed up a chance at a game-tying field goal last week and went for it on fourth-and-7 from the Buffalo 29 with 70 seconds remaining.
After a false start, he kept the Saints' offense on the field, and they failed to convert and lost the game -- which is a whole lot better than preseason overtime.
Pay it forward
The 4th Annual Walter Payton 16,726 Yard Run will take place Sept. 15 at South Middle School in Arlington Heights and benefit the Walter Payton Cancer Fund. Get details and register online at payton34.org/run.
He felt good
Comedian Alex Kaseberg: "DNA evidence revealed that late singer James Brown is the father of two more kids out of wedlock. As a result, Brown was posthumously named an honorary member of the NBA.''
And finally …
Dan Daly of the Washington Times: "The University of Miami has removed players' names from their jerseys this season. Fortunately, we'll still be able to get their license plate numbers."