Facebook helps Elgin teen find life-saving boy's family

Two families brought together by serious diseases in 2003 reunited this week thanks to a connection made on Facebook.

Todd and Mary Lamantia and their daughters Alyssa, 8, and Sarah Ryann, 16 months, of Lake in the Hills hosted Elgin family Walter Wetzel, 17; his mother, Erzsi Gemzi; and brother Kasey Cooke, 13, for nearly two hours Thursday evening.

Ryan Lamantia, who would have been 11 years old last July, died before he was able to meet up again with his old friend Walter.

In 2003, when he was 3, Ryan was diagnosed with pediatric brain tumors that he spent nearly three years fighting. Although a pair of strokes, chemotherapy and radiation treatments ravaged his body, his parents said the disease rarely stopped him from smiling. Ryan didn't understand why he was hospitalized, only that he had an “owie in his head,” Todd Lamantia said.

Walter was 9 when he met Ryan in 2003 at Advocate Lutheran General Hospital in Park Ridge, after he had been diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia. Walter said Ryan was sad when they first met because he wanted to go home, put on his favorite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle T-shirt and ride his Big Wheel to his cousin Catlyn Crespo's house.

To cheer him up, Walter made funny faces, and from that day on, they were best buddies.

But they spent only about a month together, off and on, because Ryan and Walter met in the last of Ryan's five-month stay at Advocate.

The boys lost touch after Ryan was transferred to Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago, where he remained for two years. He died at home Sept. 8, 2005.

Walter always wondered what happened to his friend, but he didn't know how to find him.

In December, Walter's mother was searching the Web and discovered the Ryan Lamantia Foundation site his parents set up to raise awareness for pediatric brain tumors and to help families in similar positions.

“I was shocked it popped up,” Gemzi said. “I was amazed.”

The next afternoon when she picked up Walter from Elgin High School, Gemzi told Walter that Ryan had died.

On Dec. 2, Walter posted a message on the foundation's Facebook page: “I have wanted nothing more than to talk to his parents and tell them their son is my hero, since the day we lost contact. ... My mom ... told me she had found a memorial for him and I could do nothing but cry. Although I barely knew him or his family, he truly inspired me. Being in the hospital for leukemia is one thing, but everything that Ryan went through surpasses any pain or hurt I could ever have.”

The Lamantias said they cried for days after reading the Facebook post, and they were delighted to have found another connection to Ryan.

“Anytime anyone brings up Ryan, we love it,” Todd Lamantia said. “We could talk about Ryan forever.”

Although the families knew each other only in passing at the hospital, they instantly felt comfortable with each other Thursday, and Walter's family offered to help raise money for the foundation.

Before Ryan died, his parents asked him to hide coins all around the house. Every time they found a coin under a couch or under the kitchen cabinets, they knew Ryan was there.

It's been three years since the Lamantias found one of Ryan's coins, but getting Walter's message and reconnecting with people who knew their son was a dream come true.

“This was kind of like our hidden treasure and our coin,” Mary Lamantia said. “It really meant a lot to us.”

Walter has been in remission for almost five years and leads an active life that includes snowboarding and high school football. He says Ryan's positive attitude gave him the strength to fight his own disease.

“Seeing him all the time made me happy,” Walter said. “How could I be upset if somebody had it worse?”