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updated: 9/4/2014 10:18 PM

Spellman's Scorecard: My math says 10-6 for Bears

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  • As The Scorecard sees things, quarterback Jay Cutler and the Bears look like a playoff team.

      As The Scorecard sees things, quarterback Jay Cutler and the Bears look like a playoff team.
    Associated Press

 
 

The Bears' special-teams units weren't good last year.

They'll be even worse this season.

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The Bears' defense was hideous last year.

There's no way on God's green earth they can sink any lower, so by my math -- carry the 2 -- that means they will improve, at least incrementally.

The Bears' offense was very good last year.

They'll be just as good or better this season.

I guess what I'm trying to say is ...:

The Bears will go 10-6 and make the playoffs.

There, I said it.

Is it weird:

That we haven't heard much from Kyle Long since the very beginning of training camp?

Booth review:

Item: Kenny, Moose and Goose will be on the call Sunday.

Thought: Eh, two out of three ain't bad.

Just a warning:

If you're in the seat in front of me in coach and you recline all the way back, I'm going to groom your head like a Capuchin monkey.

Actually:

I won't, but I'd really, really like to.

More likely, I'll set up the Double Knee Formation against the back of your chair and then nod my head knowingly when you look back to see why it's not reclining all the way.

Gotta say:

I hate, hate, hate that flights are being diverted because of this issue, but on the other hand I'm elated it has taken center stage.

About time.

Sadly fascinating:

Courtesy of Danny Ecker: With Adam Dunn's departure, John Danks and Edwin Jackson are tied for third on the list of highest-paid Chicago athletes.

Let that one sink in.

I don't know about you but:

I sure miss Nate Schierholtz.

The way he did … all those amazing things out there and stuff.

What?

More than intriguing:

NIU vs. NU.

When is the last time you ... :

• Dined at a restaurant because it was owned by a famous athlete?

• Heard Corn Flakes mentioned in a sentence?

• Reminisced about Max Armstrong and November corn?

• Witnessed so many people taking advantage of public benches in the suburbs?

• Heard anyone talk about doubles play at a major tennis tournament?

Just wondering.

Icky bad:

Have you seen the roster for the U.S. Ryder Cup team?

What's the opposite of scintillating?

I just got off the phone with vanilla and he was like, man, that's one boring team.

Put the coffee down:

Lots of grinders, very few closers.

That's not gonna cut it against a loaded European squad.

I mean, c'mon:

Webb Simpson as a captain's pick?

Nice guy, solid player, but Tom Watson needed to think outside the box and go with an up-and-coming young player instead.

And the two names who come immediately to mind are Russell Henley and Chris Kirk.

Having said that:

I think his other picks -- Hunter Mahan and Keegan Bradley -- were solid choices.

And now:

Back to Team USA vs. the Lesser Antilles in the Basketball World Cup.

Enjoy!

mspellman@dailyherald.com

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