Arlington Heights hospital event honors babies lost

Jake Gurvis could feel in his gut that something was wrong when he was pulled out of class and sent to the school social worker's office last November.

His brother, Liam, had been born just days prior and was being kept in the hospital for health complications, Jake, 16, wrote in a piece for his English literature class. His mother, Kelly Gurvis, had also been hospitalized the last few months of her pregnancy.

Still, nothing could have prepared Jake for the grief he'd feel when he sat down in the office and heard his mother's voice - barely recognizable - as she told him the news that would change his life forever: Liam had passed away.

"In that moment, all of our worst fears had been realized," he said. "My entire existence had been shook to the core."

Nearly a year later, Kelly Gurvis read Jake's essay Sunday during the 27th annual Walk to Remember at Northwest Community Hospital in Arlington Heights. Donning T-shirts in memory of Liam, the Gurvises were among dozens of families who walked around the hospital campus to honor babies lost through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, stillbirth and newborn death.

The event aims to provide families with a safe space to remember the babies they have lost and share stories with people who have been through similar tragedies, said organizer Jill Kottmeier, the hospital's perinatal palliative care coordinator.

"Everybody here knows what everybody's feeling, but the outside world doesn't always understand it," she said. "It's a good place for them to channel their grief and be surrounded by people who get it."

Before the walk, families gathered in the hospital's auditorium for a memorial service, which included special music, personal stories, and moments of prayer and reflection from Chaplain Janet Frystak. The event ended with refreshments at the Renew through Sharing Memorial Garden, which is dedicated to deceased infants.

For Schaumburg resident Michelle Keith, joining a support group and connecting with other parents helped immensely after her 20-week-old daughter, Sadie, died last year. Attending the walk for the first time Sunday, Keith said she feels less alone being surrounded by families who understand what she's been through.

"We kind of come here to support each other, but also to honor our children," she said. "It's a nice time to kind of pause, reflect, focus on (Sadie) and just think about her today."