Blind date leads to 50 years of marriage

KOKOMO, Ind. (AP) - Kay Baylor and John Shrock met for the first time on a blind date in October 1965. It would be one year and three months before they ever saw each other again.

Kay, a 20-year-old student at Southwest Texas State, now known as Texas State University, agreed to a blind date at the suggestion of her roommate, who was engaged to a guy stationed at Laughlin Air Force base, about four hours away from the college.

She thought Kay would hit it off with one of her fiancé's friends, 24-year-old John.

The guys drove to campus on a Friday, arriving a little earlier than expected. Kay had an afternoon class, so she had to postpone her blind date a little longer.

But that evening, the group double-dated to a drive-in movie theater showing "Bye Bye Birdie."

On Saturday, they drove around the area, looking at the beautiful scenery in Texas hill country. For lunch, they got steaks and the four picnicked at an overlook.

"I thought he was kinda cute," Kay said. "I liked him, but I wasn't particularly looking."

The next day, they hung out a little bit more before the two guys had to leave to report back to base.

Just a few days later, Kay got a letter. To get it that quickly, Kay supposes John must've written it the moment he got back to base.

In the letter, he told her he enjoyed the weekend with her. Kay wrote back and the two started a little bit of a correspondence.

"I thought he was a possibility," Kay said. "I just wanted to wait and see. I wanted to graduate."

Their correspondence lasted only for a few months before John had to report to San Antonio, Texas, for training and then head off to Japan for even more training. After that, Kay didn't hear from him for months.

"I thought, 'He's a serviceman,'" Kay said. "He's gone. I honestly didn't even know if I'd ever see him again. I thought about him a lot. I prayed for his safety."

Then one day, out of the blue, Kay received a letter postmarked from Thailand. John had been stationed there after his training in Japan.

Kay wrote him back, and the two wrote back and forth a handful of times while he was overseas. But she still thought the chances she'd actually see him again were slim. She thought that there was no way he'd get sent back to Texas again.

But unbeknownst to Kay, when John was sent back stateside he was stationed at Laughlin Air Force base again. He got back over Christmas break, and drove through San Marcos, where he and Kay had met over a year before.

He went to all the places they had gone together on their first blind-date weekend - the campus, the picnic overlook, the drive-in theater.

Since it was the holiday break from school, Kay wasn't on campus. But she thinks John was looking for her.

"I liked that," she said. "I thought, 'Well, he does like me a lot.'"

Finally in January 1966, the two were reunited after more than a year since their blind date. Kay went to see him in Del Rio at the Air Force base.

"We just connected and it grew from there," Kay said. "I was glad to see him. And he was happy to see me. It sort of seemed like when he came back, this is it. My eyes opened."

Later that month, Kay was the maid-of-honor and John was the best man in their friends' wedding -- the same friends who got them together.

After that, Kay and John wrote letters a few times a week, and whenever John could get leave, he made the four-hour drive in his convertible from the base to campus.

"I could hear him coming up three blocks away," Kay laughed. "That car was noisy. It had a big engine."

That June, he invited her to go with him back to his home in Indiana, about a mile east of Waupecong.

One night during that trip, as they were parked in his parents' driveway, sitting in the convertible and looking at the stars, they began talking about their future.

John told her that he wanted to marry her.

"He was sweet, he was kind, and I have never, ever seen someone more capable," Kay said. "He was smart. I thought that there was nothing in the world he couldn't do."

The two were wed on Aug. 26, 1967, at First Baptist Church in Smithville, Texas. Kay was 22 and John was 26.

Kay had one more semester left of school, so the newlyweds moved into an apartment near campus. John was discharged from the Air Force and got a job in San Antonio.

In 1968, they moved into their first home in Indiana. For Kay, the prospect of leaving Texas was a happy one. She was ready to start her own life with her husband.

"I was excited," Kay said. "I was looking forward to a place that had four distinct seasons."

But it was a bit of a cultural change for Kay coming to Indiana from Texas. Getting used to the different personalities of people around her, and living on a farm was different than what she was used to growing up in the south.

It didn't take her long to adjust, though. She got an office job, and John worked as a farmer before getting a job at a car dealership in Kokomo, where he worked for more than 30 years.

In 1970, they moved into their current home near Bennetts Switch, where they raised their three sons. After their kids got older, Kay worked as the church secretary at Main Street United Methodist for 15 years.

As far as their marriage, Kay admits it wasn't always easy.

"No marriage is easy," Kay said. "If they say it is, I don't believe them. Everybody's life has lows, but I choose not to focus on lows, because I know that he loves me and I know that I love him."

She said it was the little things that John did that made an impact on her. The small gestures, like how John would quietly fix things around the house.

Or the time when he surprised her with a silk rose. They had been married for about 10 years when it happened. It was a Valentine's Day morning in the 1970's, and Kay headed to the kitchen to make instant coffee. She opened the microwave to heat the water, and inside was a silk rose with a card.

"I can't begin to explain how much it meant to me," Kay said. "Something so simple. I love roses. I love flowers. It was just being remembered."

But these days, John's memories have faded.

John was diagnosed with dementia, and although he can't remember that blind date over 50 years ago or the silk rose in the microwave, the love he has for his wife is undeniable.

When Kay had an illness, the concern and gentleness he showed in taking care of her blew her away.

"Now, it's my turn," Kay said. "When you go into a marriage, don't go in thinking, 'What can he do for me?' Go with an attitude of 'What can I do for him?' And vice versa."

Now, after 50 years together, Kay says their marriage is enriched, despite the fact that John struggles to remember their past together.

"When you get right to it, love has to be a choice," Kay said. "It doesn't remain the giddy, newlywed love together. It's about respect and acceptance. We're not perfect, but we're doing our best."

These days, Kay still talks to John about everything, whether it's the old times they spent together or the latest family news.

"Basically, he's still John," she said. "He's the most important person in my life. He's perfect for me. My weaknesses have been his strengths."

And as she looks into the eyes of the man she loves, Kay said, sometimes she sees a twinkling of remembrance there of the life they have shared for the last 50 years.

"That man has the prettiest eyes," Kay said. "I love his eyes. We have moments when we laugh and his eyes light up in a certain special way. We enjoy those moments. Those fleeting moments."

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Source: Kokomo Tribune

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Information from: Kokomo Tribune, http://www.ktonline.com