Spy series film not your father's 'U.N.C.L.E.'

Instead of delivering an actual "The Man From U.N.C.L.E." motion picture - based on NBC's espionage TV series - director/writer Guy Ritchie and his "Sherlock Holmes" writer/producer Lionel Wigram give us "The Men Not From U.N.C.L.E. ... Yet."

Ritchie's carefully measured, short-of-spectacular theatrical adaptation takes place in 1963 before the formation of the United Network Command for Law and Enforcement. It also strips away some of the TV show's lighter tone, turning this "U.N.C.L.E." into a semi-serious Cold War espionage drama.

It's a workable, respectable tale for sure. It just doesn't cry "U.N.C.L.E."

British actor Henry Cavill, mostly known as the "Man of Steel," plays CIA agent Napoleon Solo. He faintly suggests the aristocratic voice and smooth demeanor of original star Robert Vaughn, but to severely lackluster effect.

Meanwhile, KGB agent Illya Kuryakin, originally played by Scottish "NCIS" star David McCallum as a quietly reserved, cool intellectual, is resurrected by "The Lone Ranger" star Armie Hammer as a hotheaded, overtly aggressive assassin who shoots first, thinks seldom.

Together, Solo and Kuryakin possess the charisma of a misfiring bullet.

After trying to kill each other during a car chase and shootout, the highly reluctant Solo and Kuryakin are forced to work together in an unprecedented political partnership.

They must infiltrate and stop another one of those (as the production notes call it) "mysterious international criminal organizations bent on destabilizing the fragile balance of power through the proliferation of nuclear weapons and technology."

How about calling it "The Syndicate"? Oh, wait. "Mission: Impossible Rogue Nation" already used that.

Anyway, Solo and Kuryakin develop one solid lead: Gaby Teller (Alicia Vikander, the galvanizing star from "Ex Machina"), an East German auto mechanic and the daughter of Hitler's favorite rocket scientist Dr. Udo Teller (German actor Christian Berkel).

Udo has been missing for a while. If the agents can't find him, his knowledge of weapons of mass destruction could be used to, well, you know.

A somnambulant Hugh Grant (yes, Hugh Grant) plays British Secret Service boss Alexander Waverly (originated by avuncular character actor Leo G. Carroll). Jared Harris plays Solo's CIA chief Sanders.

It would be a mistake to criticize Ritchie's "U.N.C.L.E." just because it doesn't faithfully replicate the 1964-68 television series. It shouldn't.

But the movie version should at least be as charming and tongue-in-cheek as the low-budget TV spy spoof, the first to hit the networks after James Bond movies electrified theaters around the world.

Most disappointing is the absence of Jerry Goldsmith's iconic "U.N.C.L.E." theme, except for a two-second riff briefly sampled on a radio. (Presumably, Goldsmith's music will be covered once the titular organization has been formed in the obligatory sequel that will utilize the custom-made "U.N.C.L.E." weaponry, the original tone and ridiculous secret door to the agency's New York headquarters.)

At least Ritchie's re-envisioned spy tale ranks far superior to the cheap and cheesy 1960s "Man From U.N.C.L.E." movies constructed from TV footage, with sexier and more violent scenes added to spice up what amounted to little more than underdeveloped, cinematic leftovers.

“The Man From U.N.C.L.E.”

★ ★

Starring: Henry Cavill, Armie Hammer, Hugh Grant, Alicia Vikander, Jared Harris, Luca Calvani

Directed by: Guy Ritchie

Other: A Warner Bros. release. Rated PG-13 for partial nudity, violence. 116 minutes