Let’s talk about work stress, baby
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Is work stressing you out? It may be other problems that only pros can detect. Anxiety disorders, stage-of-life crises or a wonky thyroid can overwhelm your coping mechanisms and turn every leisure moment into a giant red digital doomsday clock. Start with your primary-care doctor and follow the clues to a pharmaceutical, surgical or therapeutic solution. File photo |
Q: I am always stressed out about my job, even on nights and weekends. I’m already dreading Monday, and Friday isn’t even over! I’ve had jobs with poor work/life boundaries that gave me reason to stress in off hours, but this job shouldn’t be doing that. I’ve tried mantras, meditating, exercise, and they rarely work for long. I know the problem is mostly in my head, but I still feel helpless at controlling it. Any tips?
A: First, rule out the obvious causes. Sit down with a notepad or an observant friend and ask: When did this feeling start? What triggers it? Why is this job different? Answers could include deadlines, cutthroat co-workers, a commute that makes the Exodus look like a ride on the Six Flags party bus.
No luck? Look for more amorphous issues: lack of purpose, ennui, a bad relationship. You may not have noticed them before because the more stressful jobs drowned them out ... or because you were loudly chanting “I’M FINE I’M FINE I’M FIIIINE.” Those issues take more effort (maybe professional help) to uncover, but it’s like tracking down food poisoning: When the right cause pops into your mind, your stomach will tell you.
Then there are problems that only pros can detect. Anxiety disorders, stage-of-life crises or a wonky thyroid can overwhelm your coping mechanisms and turn every leisure moment into a giant red digital doomsday clock. Start with your primary-care doctor and follow the clues to a pharmaceutical, surgical or therapeutic solution.
By the way, a problem “in your head” doesn’t mean an easy fix. If our brains were so simple we could control them, we would be too simple to work the controls.
Q: I can’t work out the “networking” thing. I’ve got to return to the workforce after a few years out mothering; it seems insincere to start getting in contact with people when I really don’t have time to properly catch up with them. Yet I see colleagues on Facebook and suspect I should do more. I just don’t like putting my life out there. Yet it seems all-important in getting back into the swing of things.
A: “Business networking” often evokes hotel ballrooms, “Hello My Name Is” stickers and desperate grins.
But networking doesn’t have to be that awkward or phony. Compare it to Facebook, where you might have a broad pool of “friends.” You couldn’t care less if they remember your birthday. But when they post something interesting, you share it with others.
Ta-da! That’s networking.
How to carry that to a business context? As on Facebook: Announce your status and see who responds. Email former colleagues; say you’re looking to get back in the game. Ask them to share their insights over coffee. If nothing else, these coffee consults will remind you of your life, pre-Farmville.
Don’t overlook the parent network. You might be surprised at the leads that turn up during playmates.
You can lurk on job and discussion sites without putting your whole life out there. Just make sure your profile picture is of you — not your kids.
• Miller has written for and edited tax publications for 16 years, most recently for the accounting firm KPMG’s Washington National Tax office.
