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updated: 10/26/2011 5:45 AM

Media circus accompanies Cubs' new Theocracy

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  • Video: Epstein joins the Cubs

  • Video: Epstein greets fans outside Wrigley


He's back:

Who would have thought when the savior returned he would be sporting a charcoal suit, white shirt, and silver and black tie?

Good to know.

Theo-ism 1:

"There are no shortcuts in baseball."

Theo-ism 2:

"The key is to pay for future performance, not past performance."

Theo-ism 3 ... the winner is:

"There are more than enough resources here for me to win."

Had me at hello:

Gotta love a guy who references "Office Space" in one of his replies.

Looking good:

With Epstein and future GM Jed Hoyer, the Cubs will have the best looking 1-2 punch running their show since Jim Frey and Don Zimmer.

Make it stop:

Sight seen outside Wrigley Field Tuesday morning: a mom, a stroller, the Ernie Banks statue … and Ronnie Woo Woo in full uniform.

Woo-squared was later seen around home plate playing his ukulele.

How does this happen?

Not saying, just saying:

Epstein never came right out and said it, but it looks like it's farewell and adieu for manager Mike Quade.

He's still here:

And probably not going anywhere. And that would be Crane Kenney, president of business operations, standing stage right with arms folded, soaking up the waves of adulation from Theo Epstein and Cubs owner Tom Ricketts.

Here's hoping ...

Kenney didn't surf the Web or listen to the radio after Tuesday's news conference, because he would have heard whatever the opposite of adulation is.

Not your grandfather's Cubs:

When's the last time you heard the word "paradigm" used at Wrigley Field?

Cubbie occurrence:

Because of all the local TV stations covering TheoFest live, the speaker system inside the United Club was adjusted down to about minus-6 to accommodate, making it difficult at best for anyone else to hear anything that was being said.


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