Ann Curry and Matt Lauer share lessons from their fathers

Make A Difference Day is Oct. 22. The “Today” show’s Ann Curry and Matt Lauer encourage you to volunteer locally.

Ann Curry

When I was about 10 or 11 years old, my father told me something that has always stayed with me. When I would ask him what I should be when I grew up, he always said, “Whatever you do, do something that is of some service to somebody else, because if you do, you’ll know that it mattered that you were born.”

My father’s message propelled me into a life of traveling the world and seeing people in great need with my own eyes. Over the years, it’s become so deeply embedded in my brain that it’s kind of a knee-jerk reaction; it’s almost impossible for me not to step in and try to do something to help.

Once, as a young reporter on assignment, I saw a child being teased mercilessly on the playground because he had a webbed thumb. He was an immigrant who barely spoke English, and the kids made fun of him because he was different.

I did a story about him, and after it aired, a doctor called me and offered to fix the boy’s thumb for free. I told the family and went on about my life. Until one day I got a call from the hospital. The father said his son wanted to see me. I walked into the recovery room and the little boy held up his thumb. His eyes were filled with tears, and with his thick accent he said, “Thank you so much.” Realizing that something I had done had so affected that little boy changed something in me.

What I didn’t realize until much later is that by sharing his message, my father had given me the keys to happiness. In the rush and the hustle and bustle of our lives, we often forget that those simple acts of giving can give our own lives the most value, the most comfort and peace. People don’t realize that doing something for others is actually the most selfish thing you can do.

On Oc. 22, volunteer, give, or simply commit a single act of kindness and you will discover it is a gift you’ve given yourself.

Matt Lauer

One of the lessons my wife and I try to teach our kids is that giving back is not something you do just at the surface level. It’s something you should really dive into, with consistency and follow-up. That’s why we concentrate our time and energy on a few causes that are very near and important to us as opposed to lending our name to everything.

Chief among them is the Hospice of Palm Beach County, which cared for my father when he was dying of lung cancer. Being exposed to hospice was completely eye opening. Though it may sound strange, it was a wonderful education at the most crucial time.

Along with trained nurses and physicians, volunteers would come to our home two or three times a day to do things like bathing my dad, and making sure he was comfortable. They offered advice, wisdom, and counseling. They prompted us to ask difficult questions, things we were almost too embarrassed or ashamed to ask on our own.

The fact that these people who didn’t know my father took such an interest in his comfort and care was just astounding. Especially because these volunteers know they’re going to invest themselves emotionally in a family’s existence and go through one of the very worst times with them. There aren’t happy endings to these situations.

Since 1998, we’ve hosted an annual golf tournament to raise money for the hospice. And in 2001, we opened the Jay Robert Lauer Hospice and Palliative Unit at JFK Medical Center in Atlantis, Fla. Every week or two, I get another moving letter from a family who’s been helped there. Paying forward the gratitude we felt has been incredibly rewarding.

The one word that always crops up to describe the people who work with hospice is “angels.” I think that word can describe all volunteers. The selflessness of people who give of themselves to help others always makes me stop in my tracks and take a deep breath.

Even in difficult times like these, if you take a moment to reach out to someone in worse straits than you, you’ll be amazed how it will uplift you. You have that opportunity on Oct. 22. I hope you’ll embrace it.