Sofia Coppola's 'Somewhere' goes nowhere

Sofia Coppola's low-wattage character study “Somewhere” begins with a black Ferrari roaring around on a circular track.

Around.

Around.

Around.

Around, until it comes to a stop. A man slowly steps out and seems to be confused that he's back where he started.

He's going no place fast.

He's stuck in circles.

He can't move forward.

Metaphor alert! We get it.

The driver is Johnny Marco, a Hollywood movie star played with five-o'clock-shadowed lethargy by Stephen Dorff.

He resides at the Beverly Hills Chateau Marmont where he recovers from a broken arm (suffered during a drunken fall) with aid from painkillers, alcohol and two athletic, blonde pole dancers who entertain him in his room.

Marco has been around long enough to establish himself as an international star, but darn if this boring lifestyle just sucks the willingness to live out of him.

Everyday he forces himself to deal with publicists.

He even has to show up and answer inane and stupid questions at EEK! press junkets.

Then, horror of horrors! He must endure sitting still for a long, long time waiting for a plaster cast of his face to set.

Coppola captures the mundane facets of celebrity with ease and accuracy. (After all, her dad Francis Ford Coppola has had some experience with filmmaking and movie stars.)

She nails the sanitized sameness of hotels, no matter where they are.

She underscores the agony and absurdity of press junkets and the ridiculous behavior of all the participants, without resorting to embellishment.

I just didn't care.

I didn't really want to hang out with oh-so-weary Johnny Marco while he works through his thirtysomething angst — or to use a Ferrari metaphor — spins his tires.

We find out that divorced Marco has an 11-year-old daughter named Cleo (fresh-faced Elle Fanning). She comes over to visit, and they spend a lot of time together, although most of it can't really be called quality.

If you expect that little Cleo will magically give Dad a reason to appreciate life, you will be disappointed in “Somewhere.”

Coppola wisely avoids Hollywood clichés and trusts her movie to fill in the gaps without the use of standard artificial expository discussions. That doesn't necessarily create a fascinating film.

Dorff coasts on his Brando-ish bravado just so long before his slouchy, smoldering Marco begins taking on dramatic dead weight.

I suspect his character will be much more interesting once he finds his North Star, gets his bearings or (fill in any other belabored metaphor for knowing your purpose).

I just wanted to plop Johnny Marco at that dude ranch in “City Slickers” so Jack Palance could shove his finger into the actor's face and give him the “most important thing in yer life” speech.

It probably wouldn't help.

“Somewhere”

★ ★

<B>Starring: </B>Stephen Dorff, Elle Fanning, Chris Pontius

<B>Directed by: </B>Sofia Coppola

<B>Other: </B>A Focus Features release. Rated R for drug/alcohol use, language, nudity, sexual situations. At the Century Centre in Chicago. 98 minutes