Good news about civil unions for heterosexuals, seniors

Illinois' new civil union law is being widely celebrated, and rightly so, as a civil rights victory for homosexual couples. But civil unions aren't just for gay folks.

“It's actually a great opportunity for senior citizens as well,” says Bernard Cherkasov, chief executive officer of Equality Illinois, which helped craft the civil union bill and has been a key leader in the push to drag Illinois into … well, whatever century it was when states started granting civil rights to people even if they are in the minority.

“I am quite excited about this legislation's impact on older people,” says Jonathon Lavin, president of AgeOptions, a suburban Cook County agency that connects seniors with resources.

He's not just talking about gay seniors either. The people who helped craft the civil union bill worked to make sure heterosexuals from teenagers through the senior years would be able to use it to get some rights for a partner without going through a marriage.

One of the bill's vocal supporters, Sen. Rickey Hendon of Chicago, described the plight of an uncle who had failed with early marriages but spent the last 30 years of his life with the woman who was his “soul mate” even though they chose not to marry. When that uncle died, his partner was cut out of the decision process because she wasn't a relative or wife. When Gov. Patrick Quinn signs the civil union bill and it becomes law on July 1, those kinds of relationships will merit legal protection.

Many older people, even those who might oppose gay rights, no doubt will use this bill to protect their partners and the people they love. Widows and widowers throughout the suburbs often find love, or at least a much-appreciated friend whom they depend on and want to spend time with. But they often don't want to sanction their relations with a marriage because of “religious or personal reasons,” Cherkasov says.

The civil union bill allows them to “take advantage” of a law that will recognize their new partners when it comes to hospital visitations, health care decisions and some inheritance issues “without having to marry that new person and do what they feel would disrespect their original marriage,” Cherkasov says.

That is key for single senior parents who want to be happy and cared for without adding another marriage that would complicate legal matters and might be seen by their adult children as some sort of slap at the deceased parent, Lavin says. He says a civil union “recognizes the living relationship between people” without altering a previous relationship.

The law also helps seniors who often “live in sin” now because they are scared a marriage would strip them of a late spouse's pension and other benefits as well as alienate loved ones.

“I think this civil union really has the potential to take this fear away,” Lavin says.

Laws change. There was a time when laws dictated that a widow must marry her unmarried brother-in-law. Many of our laws about relationships were written in an age when the vast majority of relationships involved a husband who made the money to support himself, his wife and kids. That nuclear family has changed, and so should our laws.

“You see these laws evolving and it's not feeding into that ‘gay agenda' trap,” says Jeff Krehely, director of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender research and communications project at American Progress, a nationwide not-for-profit advocacy group for progressive ideas. Krehely argues that Illinois' civil union law is part of a “Libertarian slant” that gives people the power to “define relationships” and “take care of themselves without the government dictating you have to do it in a particular way.”

In some states, an elderly woman might be able to designate her younger sister as her civil union partner, Krehely says. This evolution makes all families stronger without “taking anything away” from traditional marriages, he adds.

I would argue that it will make traditional marriages stronger by providing a new option to people who aren't crazy about marriage but get married just for the legal benefits.

However, our soon-to-be civil union law “is not a silver bullet,” Lavin warns. The federal government doesn't recognize gay marriages or civil unions of any state.

But, just as people used to say about the civil union bill in Illinois, that day will come.