Professional cuddlers? Yes, and they're coming to Rosemont.
#8220;Do you want to be greeted with a smile, a handshake or a hug?#8221; Shoup asks.
In our #MeToo world where some people struggle about what separates politically correct from inappropriate, a friendly hug from a perverted grope, and even sexual assault from #8220;boys will be boys,#8221; Shoup, a 30-year-old college graduate who makes her living cuddling with strangers, knows the importance of setting boundaries.
One firm handshake later, she is sitting on the couch in her far North Side Chicago apartment talking about the Cuddlexpo coming to Rosemont this weekend for #8220;cuddle professionals,#8221; the #8220;therapeutic touch community,#8221; and people who just want to learn more about what cuddling could do for them. She also understands that you might be going, #8220;Eww.#8221;
#8220;When I heard the phrase 'cuddle party,' I thought that was the most awkward, uncomfortable and creepy thing you could do,#8221; admits Shoup, who agreed to be #8220;dragged#8221; to a cuddle party by a friend in 2014. #8220;It absolutely changed my life.#8221;
She quit her bad relationship, left her boring job in insurance, went to a professional cuddlers retreat, completed an online course in three months, met with other cuddling pros, earned her #8220;Cuddle Sanctuary Certification#8221; and started working as a professional cuddler in 2015.
#8220;We have professional cuddlers coming in from all across the United States and Canada,#8221; says Shoup, director of Cuddlexpo, which will run Friday through Sunday at the Crowne Plaza Chicago O'Hare Hotel Conference Center in Rosemont. Tickets start at $25 for group cuddle sessions. Visit cuddlexpo.com for details.
#8220;There are people who don't understand that cuddling is a platonic, therapeutic, almost meditative healing modality,#8221; says Shoup, who meets with clients first by phone, vetting them to make certain they understand that there is nothing sexual about cuddling. #8220;I make sure they will be totally satisfied without sexual activity.#8221;
When one new client asked her to sit on his lap, Shoup declined. #8220;I'm not comfortable with that right now,#8221; she told him, adding that if he was looking for romance, #8220;You are going to have an awful time.#8221; He left and received a full refund.
She spoons with clients, touches their faces, strokes their hair, and instantly puts a stop to anything that makes her or her client feel uncomfortable, she says. #8220;The challenge of professional cuddling is that there is not a set of cuddle positions that will help you heal,#8221; she says. #8220;It really has to be catered for each individual.#8221;
A male client who feels bullied in his adult life finds comfort by having a pillow fight to work out his aggression before cuddling. Another client is a man in his 20s who lost his family members in a car crash and misses their hugs. One female client cuddles with Shoup as a way to cope with having been assaulted. Another is #8220;on the autism spectrum#8221; and appreciates having a structured time, place and rules for touching another person, Shoup says. Some come weekly. Some visit only once a year on an important anniversary.
#8220;I have someone who brings a brush so that I can brush their hair,#8221; she says. #8220;There's also a guy who likes to brush my hair.#8221;
Sometimes, when the cuddle involves tickling or a pillow fight, it's as if she is the parent and her client is reliving some happy childhood memory, she says.
#8220;We're human beings. Touch is important to mammals,#8221; says Shoup, who also is certified by cuddlist.com. #8220;I think of what I do as therapeutic.#8221;
Studies by the Touch Research Institute at the University of Miami School of Medicine credit touch with facilitating weight gain in preterm infants, alleviating symptoms of depression, reducing pain and stress, and improving immune function. Just as it took years for dogs to be accepted as service animals, cuddlers are on that same trajectory, Shoup says.
Shoup charges $80 an hour, and most clients opt for 90 minutes or two hours, although she will cuddle for as long as six hours. Regular clients can book an overnight session and share a king-size bed with her provided they follow the rules on conduct. She offers cuddling to couples.
She hosts #8220;cuddle parties,#8221; generally with about 20 people lying on comfy mats in her living room. Any thoughts of a bacchanalian orgy are quashed during Shoup's one-hour workshop that includes cuddling exercises and a PowerPoint presentation before #8220;free-range cuddling#8221; conducted as if there were a 7-year-old child in the room, she says. Her clients have ranged in age from 21 to 93, and she says she enjoys them all.
#8220;I've always been a super-cuddly person,#8221; Shoup says, explaining how she used to cuddle on the couch with her two big sisters to watch cartoons. #8220;I've always been so snugly.#8221;