Rozner: Humans will survive White Sox park name change

It's outrageous.

Outrageous, I tell you, and something must be done about it, posthaste.

This action cannot stand.

If the people of Illinois allow this to occur, what might be next?

There will be a breakdown of basic social services, rioting and mass religious hysteria.

As Billy Bob Thornton forecast in "Armageddon," the worst parts of the Bible.

This could be the result of the White Sox selling their naming rights to a mortgage company. At least, I think it's a mortgage company.

Anyway, they sold their naming rights because, well, they want to make more money and put it into the ballclub.

Actually, on second thought, that sounds like something of a positive.

But they also changed the name from a cellphone company and everyone loved that name.

Except, well, no one actually loved that name and when it was announced 13 years ago there was the same outcry about changing the name from Comiskey Park.

And people got used to it and forgot all about it after a few months.

Besides, it isn't Comiskey Park. There was a grand old yard named such and that brilliant, but decrepit stadium fell apart and the Sox got a new facility minus the disintegrating concrete and a century's worth of odors.

It was a cool, ancient park and Sox fans - for the most part - loved it. But it was broken and busted and obsolete from a revenue-generating standpoint.

So the Sox moved on and so did the fans.

Yeah, almost no one cares about what it's called and only those hanging onto something that's been gone 25 years even think about it.

Chicago Stadium was a beloved building, home to the Blackhawks and witness to three Bulls championships and the greatest basketball player of all time.

But when they moved into a new building that had few of the great sightlines, and none of the charm or noise of the old building, the naming rights were sold to an airline.

Where's the outcry? There is none because precisely no one cares. It's not Chicago Stadium. It's just a giant, shiny building with no atmosphere, better food and clean bathrooms.

The Sox took a beating when they made the announcement a few days ago, but no one could explain exactly why they took a beating.

So they had naming rights with one company. They switched it to another company. And they'll make more money for the team and the facilities authority.

And the screaming is about what, precisely?

Right, now that you mention it, there's really nothing to be upset about.

Sure, the red arrow in the logo pointing down is in bad taste and the Sox should have had something in place before showing that on their massive scoreboard.

And there should have been a big news conference with all the appropriate parties where they explained in very simple and easy-to-understand sentences that more money for the team can only be viewed as a good thing for the Sox.

But the Sox had it handed to them from all sides, even from the local football team, which tweeted, "BREAKING: Still Soldier Field."

Now that, my friends, is nerve.

It reminded everyone on Twitter that they built a spaceship inside a national historic landmark and, thus, lost their landmark status.

Others reminded the Bears that their field conditions are so bad that it often appears unplayable.

And the Bears may have forgotten that they were preparing to sell their naming rights in the flying saucer until Mayor Daley nixed the idea after the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks.

The Sox even got it from one of their own - Adam Eaton - whom the Sox handed $23 million after one season in Chicago.

"It doesn't have that good of a ring to it," Eaton said, "but I don't know."

Maybe he also doesn't know the Sox pay his salary, and that extra revenue means more money to spend on the baseball team for which he plays.

Perhaps, after all, this is not the end of civilization. Maybe it's just a team conducting a business transaction in an attempt to bring in more cash, something sports execs spend most waking hours trying to accomplish.

The White Sox changed one stadium name for another, something that occurs from time to time in sports.

As scandals go, it's not exactly Enron.

brozner@dailyherald.com

• Listen to Barry Rozner from 9 a.m. to noon Sundays on the Score's "Hit and Run" show at WSCR 670-AM and follow him on @BarryRozner on Twitter.