Grammar Moses: You read this column, while I write it. Or do you?

Regular reader Jamie Daniel of Geneva writes me from time to time with column ideas. She will admit she has seen a great deal of change in everyday English over the course of her long life, and not all of it is easy to swallow.

She writes, "Pearl Tuttle, my very demanding high school teacher, had pet peeves; among those she instilled in me was the use of 'while' instead of 'whereas.' I was reminded when I saw 'Bernie Sanders won Oregon while Mrs. Clinton ...'" in another newspaper.

In many cases, the words are interchangeable. But when clarity is threatened - when there is a time element in the sentence - it's important to select the appropriate word.

"While" suggests contrasting things: "She's fire, while I'm ice."

But it also can signal that two things are happening simultaneously. "You get dressed while I get dinner ready."

When the word "while" suggests things are happening simultaneously - and they aren't - it's better to use "whereas."

Here is an example of how things can go awry: "It's better for all concerned for me to do the cooking while you load the dishwasher."

Even those who have no business being in the kitchen understand it would be difficult for you to load the dishwasher while I am still using the pots and pans.

Sure, you understand what I'm getting at eventually, but it forces you to pause. And you don't want to make your reader - or your partner in conversation - think any harder than is necessary.

Hanged?

My wife and I were watching an episode of "House of Cards" recently in which the First Lady takes the microphone at a news conference in Russia and confesses that an imprisoned man had just "hung" himself.

"HANGED!!!" I shouted, incredulous that a character who so deftly uses her words as weapons would so cavalierly misuse this one.

My wife hit the pause button, turned to me and with a frown said, "Really?"

This is what the poor woman's life has become.

Stockings are hung by the chimney with care. A jury that can't agree on a verdict is hung. A newborn is hung upside down and spanked. (Do they still do that?)

But if a man is executed with a rope, he is hanged.

Grammer Alert

No, that's not a practical joke or a typo.

But it could be a good marketing tool.

The people of Indiana - who brought you such town names as Gnaw Bone, French Lick and Toad Hop - in the late 1800s formed two tiny unincorporated farming settlements that sit cheek by jowl southeast of Columbus in the southern part of the state.

Alert, so named, I'd guess, to ensure that you were aware you were passing through the community of 90 souls, give or take.

Its little sister Grammer, believed to be named after a railroad conductor, has about 80 residents.

The sign didn't persuade me to make a detour and spend tourist money in those towns, but it sure made me perform a reckless U-turn to shoot a picture of it.

Write carefully!

• Jim Baumann is vice president/managing editor of the Daily Herald. Write him at jbaumann@dailyherald.com. Put Grammar Moses in the subject line. You also can friend or follow Jim at facebook.com/baumannjim.