Work advice: Stood up? Don't take it lying down.

Reader: I have been self-employed for more than two decades. This means if I'm not working, I'm not getting paid (something salaried people sometimes forget). I work hourly for some clients and flat-rate for others.

Recently, I had a meeting scheduled at a client site two hours away and had to board my dog for the day. While I was traveling, the client e-mailed me to cancel the meeting. I didn't check my e-mail en route and so made the entire trip in vain. He said merely, "Sorry for the inconvenience," but gave no explanation, which makes me think it was just a whim, not an emergency. For me it was not an "inconvenience," it was a loss of wages that I will not be able to recoup.

Is this considered acceptable behavior in the workplace these days? When someone cancels a meeting, and the other party has clearly made sacrifices to be there, shouldn't there be more effort at an explanation? I would just consider that courtesy.

Karla: Courtesy is a charming concept, but consequences are so much more effective.

I wouldn't say it's become acceptable, but it's the frustrating reality: Busyness and distractions, plus greater geographical distances between providers and clients, increase the odds of missed connections. (Bailing last-minute is also bad form in the salaried workplace, but workers there are less likely to complain about canceled meetings.)

Ever notice how most hotels and even some restaurants ask for a credit card to hold your reservation? Doesn't your doctor's office call you with chipper appointment reminders wrapped around a warning that no-shows and late arrivals are subject to a fee? These businesses may exist to serve the weary, hungry and sick, but they still don't like being stood up. Empty beds, tables and waiting rooms mean lost business and income. It's why all the freelance professionals I've talked to require deposits before they commit to a client(see more words of wisdom from them below).

So while relying on others' professionalism may have served you well until now, it may be time to update your contracts with some . . . let's call them "courtesy reinforcers." Decide how much notice you reasonably need from a client to cancel a scheduled meeting or trip. Then decide what you would consider reasonable compensation for failing to provide that notice: mileage, flight change fees, an hour's rate? Then put that provision in every new or renewed contract, and make sure the client knows about it. You can always waive the fee, but that policy reminds clients that your time is a limited commodity.

For some contracts, you may decide that the occasional sunk cost or tax write-off is worth it in the long term. But you'd be wise to let your history with each client inform your future dealings. And perhaps you should invest in some video-conferencing technology.

Voices of experience

I spoke with several freelance entertainers about late cancellations. Every one of them has a contract with clear policies on cancellations, and all require an upfront deposit just to book a date in their calendars. They also shared some hard-won wisdom that translates well to any industry.

On the value of a freelancer's time:

"You purchase a date from my inventory. I only have 365 pieces of inventory to sell every year."

- Rich Potter (Bert the Nerd), family entertainer

On severing ties with a client that doesn't respect the value of your time:

"A venue where I regularly performed start[ed] asking us to call in three hours prior to show time to see if the show was a go. I took myself off the schedule. My time is too valuable for a 'maybe' show."

- Amy Bowman (Amustela), belly-dance performer and teacher

On turning lemons into legal protection:

"It's important to have the "ability to take the problem from the last gig and correct it, by turning it into a clause in the contract on the next gig."

- Mandy Dalton, family entertainer and former talent agent