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Don't allow bullies to damage your spirit

"Some people like to make cutting remarks, but wise words sooth and heal."

- Proverbs 12:18 (TLB)

I believe each one of us has encountered a bully at some time or other. Bullies try to degrade, dishearten and discourage us with their demoralizing words.

I recall an encounter I had with one as a young woman. I shared with a group of friends I was planning to go to nursing school. One guy in the group replied, "You have to be smart for that!" I'm sure glad I didn't allow his degrading words to stop me.

Some bullies live next door. Others sit next to us in the classroom, workplace or may even be our roommate. These days there bullies are even on our social media. If you read through the Bible, you'll see even Jesus encountered bullies. They are everywhere.

Bullying is meant by the aggressor to diminish our self-worth and hurt our human spirit. However, the reality is bullies themselves have self-esteem issues. They believe intimidating others makes them more important, so they try to build their self-worth by demeaning others.

If taken seriously, being bullied can damage our emotional stability. Teens have taken their lives due to encounters with these aggressive intimidators. How we respond is important.

Responding to a bully takes some tact and understanding so we don't respond back to them in the same immature manner.

Understanding that the bully owns the problem and that it is not really about us can help soften the blow. Keeping our cool and speaking only truth while replying can help us feel a bit more powerful in the midst of an encounter. Sometimes ignoring the comments is the best thing we can do.

Sharing the situation with a friend or someone we can trust helps us vent our frustration and gives us proper insights and emotional support so we don't keep the toxic thoughts and emotions bottled up. Writing the encounter in a journal can help us unload our pent-up emotions as well.

Praying for strength and insight can help us stand our ground and know when we should report the behavior to someone who can help.

Feeding on positive passages of Scripture that reminds us of our worth and value, and having kind thoughts toward ourselves, can help shake off hurt feelings. Keeping this in mind can help us gain control of our own emotional health.

• Annettee Budzban is a Christian author, speaker, life coach and nurse. She can be contacted at Annetteebudzban@aol.com or (847) 543-8413. She is available to speak at your church group, business or be your personal life coach. Visit www.annetteebudzban.com

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