Watercooler: How to help a colleague who attempted suicide

QUESTION: One of our employees, a young woman in her late 20s, attempted suicide and was hospitalized. After a paid leave of absence and all the support we could offer organizationally and individually, she came back to work after about six weeks. Many of us urged her to take more time, but she is anxious about endangering her job and says being at work feels better than being home alone while her husband works.

Yet she's not stable. She is able to do her job adequately, but she leans heavily on one senior staffer - in and out of her office all day crying - and that staffer is exhausted from the strain. Meanwhile, those of us who best know the depressed colleague are worried about another suicide attempt. Our boss feels under legal constraints to make no observations about her health or suggestions, for fear of violating employment law.

This feels like a life-or-death matter, yet nobody knows what we can or should be doing.

ANSWER: You are right to be worried for your co-worker. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, in 2014, suicide was the No. 2 cause of death for Americans ages 25 to 34. And while your collective supportiveness is laudable, you should also be concerned about the ripple effect on you.

Your boss and HR department should immediately consult a mental health expert, either through an employee assistance program or through a suicide hotline, such as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-TALK.

The exhausted staffer and other concerned co-workers also should be directed to these resources, in part to learn how to compassionately set protective personal boundaries.

While the Americans With Disabilities Act discourages employers from speculating about or trying to diagnose employees' medical conditions, it doesn't prohibit pointing out when workers' conduct is disruptive to their performance or others'. Also, your boss is generally permitted to make the employee's return to work contingent on a medical evaluation, if there is a reasonable belief that her condition is impairing her performance or poses a threat to herself or others. He or she could also turn to the Labor Department's Job Accommodation Network for confidential consultations about how to offer accommodations without violating your co-worker's ADA rights.

All these resources should help your boss guide your co-worker to support from qualified professionals while providing workplace support. If she needs more time off for treatment, the Family and Medical Leave Act requires up to 12 weeks of job-protected unpaid leave in a year, with some states and employers offering even more.

Thanks to the Society for Human Resource Management.

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Ask Karla Miller about your work dramas and traumas by emailing wpmagazine@washpost.com.