You don't have to be 'crazy' to see a 'shrink'

Every so often I hear something like, "Sure, I've got some things bothering me. I'd like someone to talk them through with, but I don't want people thinking I'm crazy!" Or, "I told my wife we need to see a counselor, but she said she's not going to see some shrink!"

Both statements are sad commentaries on the bum rap we often give mental health services. Our opinions usually are based more on misunderstanding or lack of experience than any real knowledge of what counseling is all about.

I want to do a little to remedy that this week. I'm going to talk briefly about mental health services and how they can help us.

Not one of us can handle all aspects of our life all of the time. If we think about it, we are constantly reaching out to others for help. If my car is on the fritz and I can't handle it, I take it to a mechanic. If I have a legal question I can't answer, I call a lawyer. When I had a pain in my knee the other day, I talked to my physician.

The fact is, there is no way any of us can know enough to handle everything life throws our way. Some of us pretend we can and often mess things up for ourselves and those around us just because we won't ask for help.

As in other areas of our lives, as we grow and develop as individuals, we are bound to have some tough times too. Some may center on what we think, others on how we feel, still others on what we want to do. We live in a world of people, and our relationships also can get messed up on occasion.

Fortunately, most of the time we can work through such tough times on our own, or at least do so with the help of friends and family. All of us do get stuck sometimes, though, and just aren't able to pull things together on our own, or even with the help of those around us.

When those times come, it seems to make sense to get a little extra help. That's not easy to do. All of us need to be independent and self-sufficient - to "know it all." But we don't, and we will only make thing worse by pretending we do.

Mental health professionals are trained to help us in our growth and development when we find ourselves stuck. It's that simple. There are a number of specializations - psychiatrists, psychologists, clinical social workers, marriage and family therapists, pastoral counselors, etc.

And there are a variety of theoretical approaches to understanding people. There are even different tools that mental health professionals use - insight, communications training, stress management, behavior modification, psychological tests, and medications, to mention a few.

That can be confusing, but it's also good. Each of us has different needs; different mental health services are designed to meet those needs (just like some auto mechanics work with transmissions, some with brakes and some are generalists).

A reputable mental health professional will see that we get linked up with someone trained to help us with our specific concerns.

I use the word "reputable" intentionally. As with any group of people, there are some less-than-reputable mental health professionals. If we check with people we trust, such as our pastor or priest, physician or community services office, we probably will be directed to someone who knows what he or she is doing.

Notice that not once have I used the words "crazy" or "shrink." Those labels don't serve much of a purpose. People who need help aren't crazy; people who try to help aren't shrinks. We're all just people, helping each other out in whatever way we can.

• Dr. Ken Potts is on the staff of Samaritan Counseling Center in Naperville and Downers Grove. He is the author of "Mix Don't Blend, A Guide to Dating, Engagement and Remarriage With Children."