Don't like something? 'Correct' it

Looking for a Father's Day gift? Here's an idea from the global warming science people: Global Warming 101: National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration scientists have found a solution to the 15-year "pause" in global warming: They "adjusted" the hiatus in warming out of the temperature record.

New climate data by NOAA scientists doubles the warming trend since the late 1990s by adjusting pre-hiatus temperatures downward and inflating temperatures in more recent years. (The Daily Caller, June 5).

One of the tools employed in this ploy is called the: "buoy offset correction" - readjusting the temperature data from ocean buoys around the world.

The "buoy offset correction" proposed by the NOAA scientists may be a useful idea in other circles. You don't like the speeding numbers on that traffic ticket? Let's use the "police radar offset correction" You don't like that C-minus in Econ 101? No problem. "I'm sure I must have studied more and deserve a B-plus offset correction."

You don't like the final tally at your local grocery store? How about the "cost of carrots offset correction" (you don't have to put anything back on the shelves, just use the "offset correction" to change the prices on the receipt. How much "offset" do you "need" to make budget this month?)

Talk about useful! How about this: purchase a "Do It Yourself IRS Tax Program." Enter data, uh, oh, you owe $345.73 to Uncle Sam, but wait. For a mere $10 more, you can purchase the "income tax offset correction." Now the government owes you.

Our banking/credit card folks have had a version of this for years. I'm really surprised it has taken our scientists so long to come up with their version of "offset corrections."

Richard J. McEwen Ingleside