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Family and friends remember Elk Grove Jeremy Sears, Marine who took own life

'He was so strong, but it ended up being a weakness'

The morning of Oct. 6, Elk Grove Village native Jeremy Sears, a skilled marksman from his Marine training, went to a shooting range near his home in Oceanside, California.

What was unusual was that he wasn't hitting the bull's-eye of his target like normal.

The man shooting next to him at the range asked about the memory bracelet Jeremy was wearing in honor of a friend he fought with overseas.

“Where have you served?” asked the man, also a veteran.

“Nowhere important, bro,” Sears said.

Moments later, Sears put his gun to his head.

The 35-year-old veteran who served five tours of duty in Iraq and Afghanistan left the military nearly two years before. But since his discharge, he faced emotional and financial difficulties — made all the worse, family and friends say, when he was denied disability payments by the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs after a 16-month wait.

Those who knew Sears gathered at the Elk Grove VFW Post Tuesday to remember a person described as strong and tough who never let on about his own struggles.

“He was a very strong person. Only he cared about others,” said his wife, Tami. “He helped everyone he could with anything they needed and he would give the shirt off of his back for anybody.”

Sears recently talked about moving back to the Chicago suburbs with his wife to stay with family due to their financial problems. The couple also wanted to start a family and chose Jeremy's sister, Valerie Rusiecka, to be their surrogate.

“He texted or called me everyday, (saying), ‘I love you, little sis,'” Rusiecka said. “That's what hurts the most is that I'll never hear that again.

“I never noticed anything in his voice that was wrong.”

A U-T San Diego newspaper story, republished last week by the Daily Herald, reported that Sears applied for VA disability benefits when he retired in October 2012, but it wasn't until February 2014 that he got a response, denying all assistance. His application noted 10 different conditions, but the VA determined that only two — traumatic brain injury and hearing loss — were related to military service.

And those conditions weren't enough for compensation, according to the VA letter.

Sears lost a job managing a bread warehouse in a corporate shake-up and struggled to make ends meet, with his wife working part time and his unemployment eventually running out.

The couple sold their car and other possessions. Tami often called family and friends back home to talk about their financial problems, and many sent money to help them pay for rent, bills and groceries.

Sears would often tell his wife about the odd jobs he was working during the day — but he wasn't, Rusiecka said.

“My brother would never admit he was struggling,” she said.

Joe Riccio, a friend of Sears since fourth grade, remembers the times they and their friends in their Elk Grove subdivision would play street hockey — often hanging lamps from trees to continue their games until midnight. After graduating from Conant High School in 1997, Sears went to Minnesota to play junior hockey, before returning to join the Chicago Force minor league hockey team in Addison.

In 2004, at the height of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, Sears decided to enlist.

“He told me, ‘Dude, I'm a (expletive) warrior,'” Riccio said.

Sears, a squad leader with the 2nd Battalion, 5th Marines, survived two roadside bombs.

Years later, Riccio said, Sears admitted he lived with post-traumatic stress, but he didn't think it was as bad as the condition of others he served with.

“Jeremy didn't talk emotionals,” Riccio said. “He was so strong, but it ended up being a weakness. You can't hold it in.”

Elk Grove Village Marine gets warm welcome home

Why did Marine from Elk Grove Village take his life?

  Jeremy Sears' dog tags are worn by his wife, Tami, and sister Valerie Rusiecka. Tami also has her husband's wedding ring on her chain. Mark Welsh/mwelsh@dailyherald.com
  Jeremy Sears' wife, Tami, and brother Jeff walk with Jeremy's ashes Tuesday during a procession to the Elk Grove VFW Post. The Patriot motorcycle honor guard attended. Mark Welsh/mwelsh@dailyherald.com
  Jeremy Sears' brother Chance comforts his mother Kathy during a memorial service Tuesday at the Elk Grove VFW Post. Mark Welsh/mwelsh@dailyherald.com
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