Liberals exist in a fantasy world, somehow convinced that just one more mindless government program will make life fair. Conservatives deal with reality, seeking to reduce the horrific waste, widespread fraud rampant throughout obscenely obese bureaucracy.
Liberals justify the wanton destruction of innocent human life in the womb, cleverly marketing it as "planned parenthood". Conservatives fervently express the indisputable truth that any nation unwilling to protect human life as infinitely priceless cannot possibly have its fundamental core priorities appropriately ordered.
Liberal politicians look at voters as stupid uninformed pawns, mindless instruments serving their self-absorbed political careers. Genuine conservatives encourage every American to pursue the limitless opportunities promised in our founding documents toward the betterment of this nation as a whole.
As a decidedly liberal media dutifully carries the water for career politicians corrupted by the elixir of power, disgruntled millennials experience firsthand the pathetic reality of a jobless economy. Engaged, patriotic Americans realize only too well that our nation's survival rests with dedicated citizens most cognizant of the awesome price paid for our freedoms by our forebears. May eternal vigilance become every American's sacred vow.
Oh I almost forgot; if you like your President, you can keep him. Period.
William G. Parrot